So, as I hold a bandage around my left index finger because the two band-aids I have on it just aren't cutting it (ha-cutting it!) and type solely with my right hand I wonder why I have such a hard time cutting food without cutting myself.
This morning I thought AJ and I would enjoy fresh pineapple with our waffles. Fresh pineapple is amazing! I'm just cutting away, thinking look at me cutting fresh fruit for my son's breakfast...what a great mom am I. Well, as I let my domestic pride go to my head my hand slipped and I darn near cut off the tip of my left index finger. I freaked, shear panic set in as I saw the bright red blood gush from my finger and I went running in circles screaming. Poor AJ, he didn't know what was going on.
You may not know this about me, but after the trauma of putting my right ring finger through a vegetable slicer a couple years ago (haven't touched that thing since) and the doctor trying to put stitches in my bony little finger...I have a freakish phobia of losing a finger...it's a seriously extreme fear that even keeps me from using the paper cutter at school.
So, after running in circles screaming for God to be with me because I think I'm going to have to drive us to the hospital with one hand if I don't pass out first, I run down the hall to the bathroom, fend off AJ who has heard running water and is trying to climb my leg to get to the sink and the first aid kit is LACKING BAND-AIDS...really?! As I am wrapping gobs of toilet paper around my finger, I remember the first aid kit in AJ's diaper bag. It's a good thing I keep one well stocked in his bag, although I have yet to pull it out for him.
I get all bandaged up and lay down because I am a bit dizzy and light headed...and then I smell it...AJ's stinky poopy butt...just what I need when I am one digit down.
2 comments:
Haha. You mean poopy time doesn't come at the right time? I swear AJ uses his poop as a weapon. "You want me to sit on your lap," he's thinking. "Well, I got a surprise for you." Ugh. I will never recover from what I thought was a loving experience, but turned into a marked experience. AJ is the poop hit man. He'll get you when you are down.
I hope your finger is okay! That sounds terrible. Things like that only happen when your husband is out of town...
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